One thing I've learned after my move, was that the summer is a really lousy time to start looking for a church. Programs end for the summer, staff/leadership usually take summer holidays and laypeople or guest speakers are called in to speak, and attendence is irregular (students are gone, families and children aren't around, etc.), thus making it very difficult to find out what a church is really like.
I tried 3 Baptist churches over the summer months with the hope that one of them might be a good fit. My hope was to stay within the convention simply because I grew up in Convention Baptist churches, I'm aligned with their doctrine (for the most part), and, I'll be honest, it's what I'm used to. The church I left behind in Toronto was a Convention Baptist. But of the 3 churches I tried, none of them seemed a good fit. Here are my thoughts on each:
The first I attended was closest (in proximity) to where I was living in May-June. It was a little church with a very w.a.s.p.'y congregation. The worship was uber-traditional - hymns and an organ, and "contemporary worship" meant songs I used to sing at camp in the 80s (As the deer, There is a Redeemer, etc.), traditional structure of service, and the women dressed in skirts and blouses and the men in suits. I found the latter, most of all, off-putting. I don't mind dressing up for church, but I don't like feeling like I have to dress up. I'm looking for a church where I can be myself...in jeans (if I so choose). One church crossed off the list.
The second church I attended a couple of times. It's about a 10 min car ride away from me. Again, another w.a.s.p'y congregation, which I really don't get! Yes, I know Halifax is not as ethnically diverse as Toronto, and yes, the subdivisions (where these churches are) do tend to be fairly homogeneous, but surely there are more than white-anglo-saxons interested in worshipping God in these neighbourhoods!? My mother calls me a "reverse racist" which is a little extreme, but she's kind of right. After worshipping with my church in Toronto, one thing I've learned to value is the diversity of opinion, interpretation and spiritual experience. That's not to say that all w.a.s.p's share the same spiritual experience, because I know we don't. Each one of us brings something different to the table (the Lord's Table). Still, if you're living in communities with other cultures, I think you're missing the mark if the church is not opening up to these cultures, in one way or another. There's just something wrong when you go to a grocery store and see a wide variety of cultures in the produce section, and go to a church in the same community and can't find one person that isn't a w.a.s.p.
Another strike against this church was summed up nicely by a visiting speaker - a single woman who has been a missionary in Korea for the last 20 years - who spoke on the topic of "Can I be single, and happy too?". Her sermon was really quite good, and put singleness in a whole new perspective for me (but that would be another blog discussion), but at the end, she said what I had been thinking after my 2+ visits to that church - "are you a church that is friendly and welcominging to singles?" The answer, in my experience, was no. This was a church for seniors and for families. Not for singles. None of the ministries looked like they could accommodate a single woman without making said woman feel like the odd woman out. That's not to say I didn't feel welcome, because if one thing could be said for this church - they are welcoming! During the dreaded "shake hands with the people around you time" I had so many people come up to me, introduce themselves, barrage me with questions about myself that it would be unfair for me to accuse them of not being welcoming. But as a single, well, that's a different matter. I was definitely on my own there, and an obvious target for the confirmed socialite bachelor (because we all know every church has one) to swoop in "to welcome" me. (You laugh because you know its true!)
The third church, (and now I'm starting to feel like John talking to the seven churches of Revelation) was an inner-city church. I had high-hopes for this one. It has a long history, and though not "downtown" it's close enough to the heart of the city. This church, unlike the other two, did have good representation from a wide demographic - young and old, mixed cultures, student/academics, etc. Seems like a good mix really. I tried this church several times, always seeming to miss the Senior Pastor and landing there to hear a guest speaker...which is fine too. But after each service, I left with a nagging feeling that there's an unrest at that church. I've heard through the grape-vine that there's been leadership problems in recent years which would certainly feed that problem, but the unrest seems to run even deeper than leadership. It reminds me a lot of Walmer in some ways - lots of ministry potential, but in desperate need for help to coordinate the ministries. And I would expect it's running across the same problems - where to find people to help in a transient congregation. For this reason, I'm not going to go to this church. Though I loved Walmer deeply and built amazing relationships out of my involvement there, I think I need a rest right now. I need to find a church where I can serve whole-heartedly but without feeling like I'm the only one who's willing to do the job. It's that simple.
So, I'm a little disappointed with the Halifax area Baptist churches to say the least. But I'm not giving up. I attended a pseudo-Bretheren church today with strong IVCF roots and came away from the service with a good feeling. And I'd like to try a local non-Convention Baptist church.
The former could be quite promising. I recognized a few people in the congregation from a previous church I attended about 10 years ago, and from my camp days 15 years ago. The worship was lively and the congregation seemed anything but bland and homogeneous (when you looked around - the people didn't all look the same). At one point the worship leader asked the congregation if they were glad to be there, and there were loud cheers all 'round. The teaching was sound (albeit once again it was a guest speaker!). And I have to tell you about the worship band if only because it made me chuckle silently in my seat. At first glance the worship band was comprised of most 20/30 somethings with guitars etc., except for one white-haired middle-aged woman wearing a pink top with an embroidered white cardigan who played - get this! - the drums. It was almost comical to see her playing with her black headset contrasting so clearly against her white hair. You'd be more likely to find the same sort of woman at the church organ in any of the other churches I've been to thus far. Interesting.
And that's what I think about my church-shopping experience to this point.
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